Posted by: scintillatingspeck | November 12, 2013

Another *&#*&$! Growth Opportunity.

Every day, another chance to learn.  It’s so well-recognized, it’s been acronymized as AFGO (Another F—ing Growth Opportunity).

Some days I just want to lie down and not grow, not learn, but life never seems to work out that way.  If I’m awake and alive, the lessons present themselves, and it’s up to me to confront them with grace or clumsiness, with directness or evasion, with courage or cowardice.  If I take a few moments to muster up some grace, honesty, wisdom, and courage, it seems to go better.

It’s not my intent to hurt people.  I’m seeing even more clearly lately that “I don’t want to hurt people” does not have to translate to “so I’ll be silent / put up with things I don’t like / allow myself to be hurt / let old demons dictate how I should feel / squish myself into impossible contortions so as to maintain the illusion that I can get people to like me.”

The reality is that not everyone is going to like me, no matter what I do, and that I had best focus on being the sort of person that I find worthy of attention and respect.

The reality is that we are all very imperfect humans, and we must have discernment about boundaries and be willing to set them with clarity and kindness.

The reality is that we screw up continually and it makes sense for us to acknowledge our mistakes and apologize and change behaviors that are hurtful and disturbing and learn to live with humility.

The reality is that we are not immutable.  We change.  We flow.  We can answer that call to be stronger, wiser, more gentle, more decisive, more resilient, more flexible, more open, more loving.  We can listen more deeply.  We can practice forgiveness.  We can practice focus.  We can practice playfulness.  We can crack our own habits.

The reality is that we have this beautiful, present moment, a gift in our cupped hands, a jewel of unparalleled dimensions.  I’ll wear it as a pendant, today, dangling and sparkling, feeling all the pain and all the love.


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